Second Baby Shower Gift Etiquette

by Stacey
(Colorado Springs CO)

My co-workers, friends and family we excited to find out that I was having a second child and they all jumped on the opportunity to be able to throw a shower, but I felt funny about it, kind of selfish to want another shower or to "need" more things for the second child.

So I did research and found that it is common to have a shower for a second. My question is how proper is it to register and what would you suggest I register for? I want to avoid sounding like I want this and I want that when I need a new changing table, bedding, mattress, stroller, car seat and so on, a lot a large stuff that was ruined in storage. Please let me know, I don't want to sound RUDE!!

Our Answer:

Hi Stacey,

Congratulations on the pregnancy and thanks for your etiquette question. I would not recommend having a registry for your baby shower. It is your choice, but it is not usually looked upon kindly. It will all depend on the age gap between your children, but most people do not need the big items the second time around.

If you are in need of some big items, the best way to go about it is to have your hostess put together a group gift. Sometimes the group gifts work really well and sometimes they don't. At the baby showers that I have seen it work... it was not placed on the invitation. The hostess just contacted a few "close" friends and family, mentioned the mom needed a new_______ for the baby and that some people were going together on the gift in case they would like to participate. This is a no obligation offering since it is an etiquette no no to expect certain gifts at a baby shower. If you do have it placed on the invitation, you need to be careful as how it is worded. A phrase like...

If you would like to contribute to a group gift, contact (hostess name)

is acceptable.

Always leave it as open as possible and not expected.

I hope that helps. Good luck with the baby on the way and baby shower!

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Try a diaper shower
by: Beth

I had given away all of my baby stuff after my first child. And then 3 years later, I had the surprise of a lifetime when I found out I was pregnant. I needed EVERYTHING. I wanted to do a gift registry, but decided against it after a little research. We finally decided on a diaper theme. With the theme being a diaper shower, I got a TON of diapers. It is 6 months later and I am finally running out of diapers. I can't tell you how much having diapers helped me.

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