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Unwanted Baby Shower Guest

by Melissa
(MA)

Hi,

I am having a baby shower soon and I am the mother to be. My mother and mother in law are putting it on for me at a really fancy and nice hall. I have chosen awhile back not to invite any children to my shower as I feel that it’s not the place for them. However my mother thinks I should give an exception and invite my one and only niece, who also happens to be my godchild!

I don't think I should make any exceptions I don't feel any children should be invited no matter what! What do I do? My family is making me feel really guilty about not letting her attend. She is only 4 years old!

Please help! I didn't know what the proper etiquette was on this. My mother say yes to her and my mother in law says no! I am torn...

Melissa

Our Answer :

Hi Melissa,

Thank you for your question. First of all, I will say that the only opinion that matters at the baby shower is yours, the guest of honor. But, you are in a very hard position between family and etiquette.

I personally don't think that a fancy reception hall is the best place for children. They have a lot of energy and even the best behaved child could cause quite a scene in a place that is not that child friendly.

But on the other hand, you need to look at your family. What effect would it have if she was not invited? Would it cause a major rift or dispute in the family? If so, you might want to think about making this one exception, just to keep peace in the family.

While a fancy environment is not the place for "children", if one child had a responsible adult at her side...that was willing to take her into the hall or for a walk if she started to misbehave, I would allow an exception in your case, but only under those conditions.

I do agree with your original stance of it not being the place for children. But, with your family already making you feel guilty for not wanting her at the shower, this might appease everyone.

Although you are also free to stick to your guns and not allow her there.

Best of luck!! I hope your baby shower turns out wonderfully!!

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